Ron Burgundy's Version of the Events

  everything they heard on TV. This was an age when only men were
  allowed to read the news. And in San Diego, one anchorman was more
  man then the rest. His name was Ron Burgundy. He was like a god
  walking amongst mere mortals. He had a voice that could make a
  wolverine purr and suits so fine they made Sinatra look like a
  hobo. In other words, Ron Burgundy was the balls."

And, 3, 2, 1 ..... rolling........

The minor issue of facing extinction has increased pandas' need for procreation. 
The panda breeding center uses all of its knowledge and ability to induce the mating of the pandas, 
and all the newborn cubs are specially nurtured in order to reduce the number of premature deaths. 
The local female panda, who had mothered the largest number of cubs in the breeding center's history, 
had strikingly been named "Hero Panda Mother". But finding a mate can be equally challenging in 
the animal kingdom as it may be for us, and you can't avoid the occasional bump on the road. 
But you've got to get back up on your feet, or in the case of a panda, on your ass, and move on to the next venture.

Left: Dude, I don't think she liked that piece of bamboo I gave her..
Right: Dude, forget about her. She wouldn't know a good piece of bamboo if she sat on it...



One of the great pleasures on the streets of Chengdu (and the rest of China) is the variety of food stands. Every morning the streets would slowly gather life from the assorted chefs who light up their kettles and start mixing their special ingredients. Some of the most distinct local cooking can often be found in these modest kitchens, and no one will be left hungry to carry out their hard day's work.

Then later when the sun starts to set, nothing gets you going like hitting the food quarters with an empty stomach from a whole day's walking. You will find all the fresh flavors you can imagine, cooked up neatly into a cup of noodles, rice or new baked bread. Man, the bread.... One specific piece of bread stuck to my mind not only because it was delicious, but also because of the beautiful, yet brutal way it was prepared. The chef took a piece of dough and simply slammed it into this crude looking barrel full of burning coal. There's just something about food being prepared in a special manner like that, which makes it even tastier. Anyways, the best part with the food quarters is that you get to taste a little bit of everything, or almost everything. The downside is that eventually you get full, or as some like to put it "you get tired of eating". I just hate when that happens. Don't you?

And.... cut! That's a wrap...

Brian Fontana: Hey, you're making me look stupid. Get out of here, Panda Jerk!

Ron Burgundy: Great story. Compelling, and rich.