Denmark

September 14th 2010

I just bought a European map and am looking at it. I´m feeling pretty darned excited about this. I´ve basically got the route nailed down and my biggest worry is being on time. The average daily distance will be 85km or so; taking into account off days. Aside from not feeling fit enough to be doing this, I´m definitely prepared. I guess I should probably get some info on the place I am going to go to. Do I need it though? And if I don´t need it - if I don´t want facts and figures on each place I will go, then why am I going? What is my purpose? I guess I´ll find out soon.

The cargo ship I am taking to Denmark has about 10 very shy middle aged Finnish sailors on it. We all blushed for about the 15 minutes of uncomfortable silence during dinner. Tomorrow I plan to begin to éntertain´. But for now I´ll take it easy on them. 40 hours here on the boat and then it begins. I have an mp3 player (with 89 songs), a novel, my aforementioned map, and this pen and paper....and still, 40 more hours to kill.

September 15th (9am)

I am obsessively looking at my new map. After a tough night (loud and wavey) from the 3-4 meter swells on the Baltic, I woke up to land on the left of us. Immediately I got out my map but it is not helping since if we are more than 1/3 complete, as the time dictates, then we should be seeing nothing at all on the left, and intead coming up to Sweden on the right. I just checked my compass and it tells me we are headed South East. I guess I need a new compass.

I dreamed last night that there were suddenly tropical fish and seaweed out my window. I was scared at first, thinking we had sunk. But later on the captain told me he had taken a special ´sewer´route to avoid the waves. It wasn´t until just now that I realized that was a dream.

(12pm)

 Rain, rain, rain, and more rain is in the forecast. It turns out the land to the left of us when I woke up was Gotland, a Swedish island, which I had a ssumed we would sail on the SOuth of but instead we sailed to the North of it. Now I am annoyed at myself becasue I´ve already written the boat route onto my map - and now I´ve found I´ve done it wrong.

(2pm)

I just took the binocs out to the left (port?) side of the outer deck and counted 11 huge wind turbines. We´re now about half way time-wise so, that must be South of Stockholm. We are now in the same time zone as Paris. That fact and Bastian´s mp3 player (ALexi Murdoch) are the main things helping the day go by. My entertainment has been Augusten Burrows´"Running With Scissors", which I highly recommend.

(3pm)

I just peeled the `Far West` label off of my rain coat and thought to myself that it would save me some weight. Then I realized how silly that was. The peel wouldn´t get recognized by any weigh scale outside of a chemistry lab. The act obviously won´t save weight but it made me realize how concious I´ve become about how heavy my stuff is. I need to start strategizing on how to lose 5kg or so of stuff from these bags before Berlin. Cause after Berlin, it´s allllll uphill. The biggest weight contributors are my soaps and the Red River Cereal I brought with me from Canada. I guess I will have to eat and wash extra hard this week, if for no other reason that to make it an easier ride.

(4pm)

I go outside to the mid deck every once in a while for some fresh air. It´s cold, wet, and extremely windy. The wind whips as if it is trying to smack me off the boat. The cold bites. I realize I am on a cargo ship in the middle of the Baltic, headed for Denmark. And I feel alive!

September 16th 10am

I´ve only made 12km of progress so far. And I´ve been riding for 2 hours! What I mean by that is I started off North for 1km (trusty old compass) but needed to have gone South. And since then have gone down dead ends. twice. My paniers are driving me crazy. They hit my tire every little bump! Other than that, so far so good. it´s 14Celcius and a bit windy but no rain in sight.

Wishing I had a more detailed map.

Said good bye to the crew at breakfast this moring. As I ate my last Karelianpirra (my favorite Finnish breakfast), I said to the captain, half jokingly, "Well I guess this is the last good food I´ll be having for a while". And with his Finnish demeanor (furrowed brown, frowned mouth) he replied "Yeah, until you get to France, anyways." My face dropped. I knew I should have stolen the tobasco sauce last night while everyone was sleeping!

I thought as I got off the boat : what do I know about Denmarkk?

Well, I hear it´s a flat country with a lot of wind (right so far). I hear the people are ranked both as the happiest and unhealthiest people in the world (have yet to see soemone without a cigarette). And all I know about the food is the pastry known to me as the Danish.

(1130am)

Pourring. Torrential rain. Found a bus stop in the nic of time and am currently parkd in it with my bike. Waiting. Looks like it could be a while. Might even get my stove out and make some tea.

PS, I´m riding my bike through Denmark!!!!!!!!

(530pm)

Why is it that when you think to yourself that things can´t get much worse, they do? Rain. 30km/hr head wind, lost four times, crazy hills, no campground in sight. Just when I thought I was back on track (found a sign that had a word on it that matched a word on my map at about 87km on the day), WHAM! another huge rainstorm.

On the bright side I am safely tucked in someone´s barn.

I want to sleep here. I just want to sleep. I´ve been riding almost non stop (minus two bus stops to get out of the rain) since 8am. That just shows you how insane the head winds have been! What hurts? My hands, my wrists, back, crotch, butt, head, neck..what doesn´t hurt? I would sleep here. But I only have a cup or so left of water.

(630pm)

It´s official, I am staying here for the night. I just looked outside and it is not only pouring, but the sun is going down. Ahh! I just heard a voice! What if I get caught? How embarassing! I´m 29 for godssakes. I printed out 3 maps and none of the words on any of the signs match any of them!

Side note: Vejle and Horsens were great little towns to ride through and I would go back to them again.

In a car. On a sunny day.

September 17th

Up and out of there before 7am. Considering the circumastances I slept pretty well. Even had a crazy dream with the entire Wakutz family at a casino. Saw my first whole rainbow within the first few km. Must be a sign, right? Yeah, a sign of rain! Surprise, surprise I am sitting on the back stairs of a truck stop, now, hiding. I found the main highway now though so I´m not feeling as lost. Still, all 4 maps are not helping. Just go South I guess.

(930am)

Oh my god I just bit into my first REAL Danish. I can´t even begin...to...describe.... Take the best possible pastry you´ve ever had and multiply it by 1000. Jeeze. While I eat this delightful danish I will tell you, you will never beleive what just happened.

About 1.6km after I just wrote "I found the main highway now..." and mentioned I was feeling better, I followed a sign to Kolding, the next major city on my map, where I was planning on getting my bearings and a real plan, like, where to sleep tonight. Then I got onto this on ramp thing and onto the major highway. As soon as I started turning I though "oh, this isn´t good" and all the cars and trucks agreed with their non-stop honking. But I couldn´t turn around and I couldn´t get off! So I just kept going and figured it wouldn´t be so bad as it was only 15km.

Well, the highways police officer who pulled me off the road didn´t think the same way. Angrily, he chucked my bike into his car, sat me in the front seat, and began to quiz me. But it wasn´t long before we hit it off. He´d cycle toured New Zealand; his wife just ran the Beijing marathon. So by the time we arrived at my destination, he offered to drive another 20km south to get me 60km from th German border.

(1130)

Anywas, this brings me back to my Danish pastry. Which, did I mention was heaven? And I am still sitting at the truck stop diner he droped me off at. Trying to warm up and dry off and waiting for the rain to stop before I head out again.

(8pm)

So this is how karma works. Good karma- from kicking rocks off busy roads and picking up random garbage off highways- leaves you in a barn at night. Bad karma comes from getting to the point where so much crap has happened that you just say "eff-karma", steal a cob of corn from a farmer´s feild on the side of the road, and when you go to get your pot to cook it, you return to find someone has stolen your tuna.

Aside from the perpetual state of wind/rain and people stealing my tuna, Denmark sure hasn´t topped any of my lists (if only i had a ´best place to eat pastry´list). I am happy to be entering Germany asap tomorrow morning. I hope there is more stuff in English. Nothing is in English here. Nor in any other language for that matter. Even at the border. NO German!? Also, side note, Danish people speak English worse than the Chinese. And that is really saying something.